I wrote this last year when I was surrounded by an oddly obscene amount of manipulation, selfishness and dark, strange individuals who use others, and lie and scheme their way through their entire lives so much so, they don't even know themselves. The masks they wear are like none I've ever seen. Despite trying to cover and hide it, they are wreckless and heartless. Their conscience only goes to the extent of the identical company they keep. It was like being part of and watching a depressing, sad, angry movie with no ending. It was eye-opening, it taught me a lot about perspective, and mostly about what human interaction should and shouldn't be...
When I was a little girl I couldn't wait to grow up because I thought adults were like...these super cool, super fun people who had all kinds of freedom to do whatever they wanted. They didn't have rules of bed time, bath time, and come-home-now-because-it's-dark time. They wore whatever clothes they wanted, fixed their hair how they wanted, and could say bad words without being threatened with a bar of soap or being grounded...which was the worst, most boring and torturous hell of all childhood punishments when a day felt like a week.
Adults were so lucky... or at least they seemed to be. As I grew up, I started noticing that a lot of them weren't as cool or fun as I thought. In fact, some were the epitome of what kiddos are raised not to be. They were downright mean, hateful, ignorant and selfish. The only feelings taken into any kind of actual consideration were their own. They made excuses for bad choices, horrible behaviors and all sorts of lies.
Oh, they did what they wanted alright, but I saw that it was at the expense of other people.
I noticed it a lot.
I still notice it.
I don't see genuine love, caring and compassion as often as I thought I would or as I should. I see it scattered among friends, family and co-workers here and there but really it's almost non-existent. We live in a "me" culture and society where everyone wants what they want and they want it now, "or else... (insert threat or ultimatum here)."
It's always about their own happiness, the lack thereof, their own accomplishments, or their own struggles. They don't take notice of or care about those of others. If the threats and ultimatums don't work to get what they want, they resort to conniving, sneaky, manipulation. The worst part is that one of their tactics usually works and it only continues and furthers a twisted, sad pattern.
Are these things done for attention and self-validation, or are these people just clueless that they're really just heartless assholes? Reflect for a second. How difficult is it to take all of the focus off of ourselves and ask someone else how their day is?
How they're feeling?
If they're happy?
If they're sad? If they're stressed? If they're anxious?
If they need anything?
If they're doing okay overall? Really, not very. Everyone should try it. It could make a bigger impact on someone's day than we think it might. One of the best feelings to have is knowing someone really just cares.